Wow what a crazy last two weeks it has been! The roller coaster of emotions has been terrifying, exciting, draining and more amazing than I could ever have imagined. It is so amazing to me the bond you feel with your own child. Don’t get me wrong I love my nieces and nephews, which is what makes it so shocking how different it feels when it is your own little baby girl. I was worried in the back of my mind that I would not bond with Isabella until I could take her home, but from the first time I held her I was head over heels! Also it is so incredible to me how much hardships and joys makes you appreciate your spouse in a whole new way. First with going thru grieving my dad and now through the ups and downs of NICU my husband totally amazes me!
Isabella is 9 days old and doing great! As of last night she is back to her birth weight of 3lbs 6oz after going down to 3lbs 2oz. She is still breathing on her own and keeping her stats up. They did have to start her on caffine due to the bradycardias she was having, where her heart beat would drop all the way down to 30 beats per minute from an average of 160. But since being on the caffine she has only had a couple of minor ones, thank God cause those were freaky! She is now recieving 32ML of fortified breast milk every 3 hours. They fortify it with extra calories and protien to help her get some fat on her bones. Yesterday she was throwing up quite a bit, (the nurses say it is like a vegetarian starting to eat steak)so they slowed down her feeds. It now takes about 1 hour and 15 mins for her to get the 32ML through her feeding tube, and she only threw up one little tiny bit tonight. We are hoping when they weigh her in a couple hours to see another ounce on the scale.
Even though Bella is doing great, it can be such a tiring experience living at the NICU. I am finally learning not to panic everytime her alarms go off, as I learn more what the numbers mean, when to be concerened, and how to help her. It also helps that I am starting to be more hands on, changing diapers, taking temps and dressing her. It makes me realize she is not as fragile as she seems. Yesterday was kind of a rough day since both of our holds were cut short due to her throwing up. When she throws up too much it comes out her nose making it hard to breath around her feeding tube. So they have to rush her back to bed to suction her out. And since those Kangaroo care times are what I so look forward to I was pretty disappointed that both were so short. I also think I was just over tired and strung out! My husband took me home to take a nice long bath and sleep in my own bed. It was exactly what I needed and came back today feeling much more refreshed and capable of dealing! And God gave me a great day today with awesome holding times, and hardly any alarms.
Oh yeah they also did her brain ultrasound today and checked for bleeds. They do these with every preemie when they are 10 days old, and hers came back great! Also her Bilirubin levels have been going up slightly. So far they are low enough that she does not have to go back under phototherapy lights, but if they continue than they will most likely be starting that up again in the next couple of days. It is nothing to be to concerened about the only thing is that my holds will be shortened to 1 hour each time if she is put back under the lights. All in all she is doing so much better than the doctors and nurses predicted and they all keep talking about what a rockstar she is. The nurse the other night told me that she is getting fiesty and she said as cliche as it sounds the fiesty ones always do best…so here is to my adorable, fiesty and incredible daughter!