I don’t know if any of you have heard this song from Jon Mclaughlin before, but I find it so perfect in summing up how a girl feels, as she transitions from girl to woman. It is called Beautiful Disaster.
She loves her momma’s lemonade
Hates the sounds that goodbyes make
She prays one day she’ll find someone to lead her
She swears that there’s no difference between the lies and compliments
It’s all the same if everybody leaves her
And every magazine tells her she’s not good enough
The pictures that she sees make her cry
She would change everything, everything, just ask her
Caught in the in between of beautiful disaster
She just needs someone to take her home
She’s giving boys what they want
Tries to act so nonchalant
Afraid to see that she’s lost her direction
She never stays the same for long
Assuming that she’ll get it wrong
Perfect only in her imperfection
She’s not a drama queen
She doesn’t wanna feel this way
Only 17 and tired, yeah
She’s just the way she is
But no one’s told her that’s OK
This song always really makes me think about all the things that went on in my head, heart and life during that phase. And it really makes my heart ache for the young girls I love who may be living this now. I just wish that I could fast forward the learning process for them and that they could know all I know now without having to make some of the same choices and painful mistakes that Idid. And I know to some of you mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles and friends to these girls, it can seem so frustrating. You just want to shake them and ask them why they can’t see how much more valuable than that they are! Or maybe you think they are just being “drama queens” as the song says. But the pain of transition to adulthood is very real for a lot of girls. The world spends so much time telling them that they need the looks to get the man, and the man tomake them happy. They need you to tell them otherwise!
From the time you hold that baby girl, tell her how beautiful and perfect she is. Teach her how valuable she is and not to put herself on sell. I get so sad watching these jewels of infinite worth sell themselves at pawn shop prices!There are 2 lines from the song that really get me “She prays one day she’ll find someone to lead her” – and “She just needs someone to take her home ” Every girl and everywoman needs a home, a leader. Woman are made to have a man to lead them, and that doesn’t change when they turn 18. So when they move out on their own, please parents don’t leave them leaderless! It is still your job to care for them, protect them and advise them until a husband steps into that position. I know alot of people would say that it is very “antifeminist” to even suggest such a thing. But I just think that a young women loves so easy and offer emotions up so readily. And because of that I do believe she needs someone to stand in between her and the ones who would take advantage of that. Until she grows in her confidence and matures enough in her faith to make that stand on her own!
Just remember parents and friends when you wanna roll your eyes over
her “hormonal drama” – what a position of honor it is to be entrusted to care for that little girl and what an incredible job to get to help shape her into the amazing woman she is becoming!